September 12, 2005
Christopher Walken 2008
Is this for real? It seems to be.
Some platform snippets:
"We are committed to Iraq now, and nothing can undo that. As President, I will not abandon our troops or the Iraqi people, both of whom have made great sacrifices in the name of peace and freedom. I will seek the aid of the world community to form a special peacekeeping coalition to assist with the consolidation of power in Iraq. My top priority will be to stabilize Iraq under this international force and end our occupation."
"I believe that campaign finance is a very tough issue, with good points on both sides; but I feel, as a wealthy American, that I should have no more say than even the least fortunate American citizen. Free speech in politics is about the voices of all those who support you, not who supports you with the biggest voice."
"I believe in the American family. I believe that every child deserves a loving home with parents who can afford to raise and care for them. Every woman has the right to have a child when she is ready, and I believe her government has no right to force a child upon her when she is not."
Why does he want to run for prez?
Now, more active than ever, Christopher Walken has realized that the state of his country is in disarray, and the politicians in charge care less for the citizens they serve and more about fattening their resumes and campaign chests. Having residences both in rural Connecticut and upper-west Manhattan, he sees that all walks of life are becoming disgruntled and apathetic towards the American government, and feels a duty, as a child of the American public, to restore the peace, prosperity, and greatness of the United States.
Nothing about any experience that would make him a good candidate, other than a desire to "do good."
Will the American people bite?
UPDATE: It's a joke, folks. Whew!
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