October 06, 2006
Robert Byrd, King of Pork
>
I've decided to highlight Senator Robert Byrd, D-WV, who would likely become head of the Senate Appropriations committee if the Democrats retake the Senate.
Known as the "King of Pork," Byrd shamelessly pads bills for such worthy causes as military expenditures with little "extras" for his home state of West Virginia. While this makes the folks who keep voting the old buzzard into office happy, it doesn't bode well for government spending and our pockets. Byrd has secured over a billion dollars in pork money for his state, funding projects such as the Robert C. Byrd Highway, Robert C. Byrd Federal Correctional Institution, Robert C. Byrd High School, Robert C. Byrd Freeway, Robert C. Byrd Center for Hospitality and Tourism, Robert C. Byrd Science Center...just to name a few. (Let's not forget the statue of him in the West Virginia state capitol rotunda.)
Words from Byrd: "One man's pork is another man's job. Pork has been good investment in West Virginia. You can look around and see what I've done." Remarks made March 15, 2001 during Senate floor debate.
I've taken it upon myself to write a song about Byrd. Sung to the King of Pain by the Police, it's called King of Pork:
Read More "Robert Byrd, King of Pork"
There's a little old bill on the floor today
It's the same old thing as every day
There's a piece of pork that I have to shop
Wanna sneak it in, don't let the cash stop...
I have stood here before popping my Senate cork
Into government coffers I will dip my fork
I guess I'm always hoping you won't think I'm a dork
But it's my destiny to be the king of pork...
There's a little old bill on the floor today
(That's my greed up there)
It's the same old thing as every day
(That's my greed up there)
There's a road with my name upon it right on top
(That's my greed up there)
Gotta build it quick so the cars won't stop
(That's my greed up there)
I have stood here before popping my Senate cork
Into government coffers I will dip my fork
I guess I'm always hoping you won't think I'm a dork
But it's my destiny to be the king of pork...
There's a visitor's center for one and all
(That's my greed up there)
There's a prison where felons write upon the wall
(That's my greed up there)
There's a federal building where bureaucrats spread
(That's my greed up there)
There's an office complex where the workers earn bread
(That's my greed up there)
I have stood here before popping my Senate cork
Into government coffers I will dip my fork
I guess I'm always hoping you won't think I'm a dork
But it's my destiny to be the king of pork...
There's a statue of me with my hand held out
There's a courthouse throwing justice right on out
There's a dam that's sure to keep my name in your head
There's a freeway -- fiscal restraint now is dead
King of pork
There's a clinic for the pain that's in your back
(That's my greed up there)
There's an institute named for a partisan hack
(That's my greed up there)
There's a little old bill on the floor today
It's the same old thing as every day
I have stood here before popping my Senate cork
Into government coffers I will dip my fork
I guess I'm always hoping you won't think I'm a dork
But it's my destiny to be the king of pork...
King of pork
King of pork
King of pork
I'll always be king of pork...
« Hide "Robert Byrd, King of Pork"
Show Comments »
